Free Time

Well I'm done with finals and have some time off from school. I'm pretty excited about. I get to work on stuff I haven't done in awhile like writing. I'm in the middle of a starting new lyrics and I hope it comes out good. The song is titled "Shadow." I just wished I knew how to play an instrument to add music to it.
We'll see maybe one of these days.. ;)

Thank you

I write this for someone I cared for and has found love and married.

Dear Anonymous:
 If things were different and you were here I'd probably be crying. Once upon a time, we were friends and as I grew older I wanted more. But you didn't feel the same. I felt broken but with time I healed. I always prayed to Jehovah God why I'd I have to have feelings for you when it wouldn't work out. Now I know why. I thank you for turning me down. Because if it were different, I probably wouldn't be where I am today. A place were I had always found peace in my life and no worries. I know that you may not understand what I am saying, let me put it in simple words. We are different with different beliefs and morals. I have to admit that sometimes I still wished that you liked me. I get memories about the past and I remember how I felt.
I really do congratulate you and your new wife the most happiness in the world. You will always be my friend and I hope that we see each other again, because I miss you. You are an amazing person and have such a good heart.
Love, Sandra

Macie's Story

A little over three years ago, my 2 year old Yorkshire Terrier, Roxy died of a liver shunt. It was one of the saddest days of my life...
It took me a few weeks to heal and to this very day I miss her. Even though I only had her for two years, I was very close to her.
It also took me a bit to think about getting another one. I started looking at petfinder.com and looking in the local newspaper for several weeks to look for a reasonable price. Then one day I came upon one ad. The lady had different small breeds and as my mom talked to her, she described what we were looking for. A female puppy or a young dog. The lady said she had a 5 month old female puppy, so we decided to meet her.
 That weekend, it was August 7th to be exact, the lady would meet us at my moms work. When she came, the back of the truck was full of dogs in cages. From Pomeranians to Chihuahuas to Yorkies, dachshunds, and poodles. It was a total mess and you could tell they were neglected. The lady's husband took out a yorkie forcefully, and gave it to me. I looked at it and then to my mom. He handed me a male. I gave him back to the husband and this time he took out another one by her neck.
As I held her I wasn't sure. She was matted completely all over her body. Entwined with dog poop and whatever else. This dog was not bathed for months. She was scared and I felt sorry for her. My mom did too. So we decided to take her.
As seen in the title above, I named her Macie, Macie Madison.

 

 

When I took her home, right away I took her a bath and tried to cut out the mats. The water was dirty as I washed her. She was afraid of her new surroundings and hid under the table. It took her a few hours to trust me and she did. My mom took her a second bath and worked on her hair also. Underneath all that filth and neglect was a sweet, adorable, happy puppy. I fell in love with her.. But that's just the beginning.

As weeks passed, Macie felt at home. The vet said she was strong and healthy. But something about Macie concerned us. Her belly was growing! Yes, viewers Macie was pregnant!!

We denied of her being pregnant because she was just a puppy. My mom thought she was constipated.

At about 7 in the morning on September 29, 2010, I woke up to crying. I thought it was Macie. I turned over to look on the other side of my bed and saw Macie with a puppy that was just born. I was so surprised. I got up to go to my moms room to tell her. The look on my face, made my mom though something was wrong. "Mom, Macie had a puppy!" I said.

Then she got up to see. I guess she wasn't a puppy after all. We figured about a year old. We went back to sleep and an hour later she had another puppy.

These puppies were all black and had white on there chest. They weren't full yorkie. It was funny because it happened on the day that Macie had to go to the vet to get her last "puppy" shot. So we took them along to check to see if they were healthy.  They were! And the vet thought our situation was funny too. We had to decide quickly on their first days if we wanted to dock their tails.

The puppies were a female and a male. I named them Ellie Paige and Teddy Bear Mason. We ended up giving away Teddy, but still see him all the time. I really wished we would of kept them both. Macie and Ellie fit into our home very well, and we love them :)

 

Teddy and Ellie @ 4 or 5 weeks!

 



Letters..

A few years ago, found that writing letters help get thinks out in the open even for the ones you don't send. I written letters to my dogs that past away and buried the letter with them. I know it may sound weird, but it helped my sadness and have a piece of mind. A lot has been on my mind and in my diary I decided to write a letter that was not meant to be sent. Just something for me to have on paper. I wrote it for the person that I have developed feelings for as of right now. I say right now because I want to get to know this person better and see if he is right for me.
So my advice is that if you have something on your mind write it down or write a letter. It will feel so much better. Maybe even if you want write a song or poem about it!
Goodnight viewers...

This last Weekend

Hello Viewers!
Today was a beautiful sunny day until it got cold this evening. Well I am here just to tell you about my weekend. I spent Friday and Saturday with my friend Ashley. We had Shirley temples and ice cream.. We watched movies and talked of Superman jk jk.. We did watch Lois and Clark though. Friday night was excited because, her neighbor and friend (who I also went to HS with) came over and was attack by Ashley's cat! By accident though, Ashley's brothers dog snuck over and freaked the cat out and punctured her leg! Crazy action.
 Then Saturday we got coffee and went out in service.. I then came home and did homework.. I have so much of it since I started the semester. OH BOY! Anyways I'll try to write soon with a better topic or if I write something interesting or something..
GOODNIGHT~

Summer is almost over

So my summer is coming closely to a close. I start back next week. I'm sure those of you who are still in school are starting soon also. I hope that this semester won't be as stressful. I really didn't do too much this summer. In June I had a convention in Sacramento and my dance recital after. In July I went to visit my family in the LA area. While I was there I went to the Wax museum, Disneyland, swimming at my cousins, saw Despicable Me 2. It was quite fun..
But yes my time off is almost over and I just have to deal with it. Here is a picture of me by the Alice in Wonderland ride. I love my Minnie Ears!

 

Am I Beautiful?

Beauty is most important when it comes from the inside. But even though that is true sometimes it doesn't feel like enough. Everyone always go through self-consciousness and low- esteem. It tends to be a natural feeling. I always wonder this many times. I don't always feel beautiful.
I wonder if he thinks I'm beautiful?
Stay Positive viewers,
Sandra

Weird Dreams

      Its funny how the subconscious mind works sometimes. When I sleep I tend to have the weirdest dreams that don't make sense. Like last night... Why do I always get the weird dreams...? I dreamt that I was going to get married to someone I didn't want to get married to and he couldn't make it so there was a stand in for someone else which seems really weird. I was also not getting my way with anything. The stand in's mother was controlling everything even my dress and hair. It was a forest green, the dress.
       Then at the entrance gate to where we were having the ceremony, the person I wanted to be with, which I never told him my feelings was there. I thinking, "STOP THIS WEDDING! I WANT TO BE WITH YOU !!"  But I never knew how it ended. It stopped. I woke up..
    And in another part of my dream that was unrelated, Jesse McCartney was in it. But I don't remember what was going on.
Dreams are just weird, and I've had weirder before...

Costume

 

 

I thought I'd put up a picture of my costume. Below it is a video I took of the Parent dance off during intermission. Enjoy!

 

 

End of the Year Dance recital

So yesterday I had my dance recital. It was called 'Crank it up'. For the past few months we were working hard for this show and all in 3 hours it was over. I am always in at least two numbers, but this year I only did one. Just a few weeks ago I was going to be in two,(Jazz and Hip hop) but I was going through some stuff and my hip hop class was getting too overwhelming and I couldn't keep up. I wish I could of stood but there is always next year. It was the end of the year recital. The song I danced to was Rabiosa by Shikira. My costume was a dress, the top was red,gold, and pink sequence with spaghetti straps and the skirt was black velvet. We had a red head band and fishnets to go with it along with our jazz shoes. My mom, dad, and niece Andrea came to watch.
I performed in the first half and after I was finished, during intermission I went out to join them to watch the rest of the show. During intermission the studio had a parent dance off on stage. One of the hip hop teachers taught a really short dance and the parents were judged and they had prizes. 1st place was a $300 dance tuition scholorship, 2nd was a necklace, and 3rd was a gift basket from Olive garden. It was really entertaining. My parents weren't in it though, they wouldn't do something like that. There were also a couple of older people who were in it.
There were a lot of great numbers! There was one in particular that really entertaining. It was a tap number to 'Old Time Rockin Roll and Single ladies." The girls dressed up like old grandmas and it was so funny.
I can't wait to dance again soon. It's so much fun to be on stage and just letting loose and having fun. Smiling, facial expressions, full on energy.. Until next post. Talk to you soon viewers!
Sandra

Anxiety is Hard to deal with Sometimes

Anxiety is hard to deal with sometimes
When you feel that there is nothing you
can do about it. Or when you cry and
feel like it's never going to go away.
Sometime you don't want to leave your
home.

I want to cry and put down everything.
I may cry, but I can't put everything down.
There is meaning in my life, it just feels sometimes
hard to believe, but I do.

One day I'm going to wake up and feel free.
One day I'm going to be happy about my accomplishments.
One day I will be off this roller coaster.

Yes, anxiety is hard to deal with sometimes,
but we all just have to get through it.
We're not alone.

Beautiful Spring!

Hello Everyone,
Today is such a beautiful sunny day! At least where I live it is.. I really love spring. It is my favorite season. I love when it's just the right temperature, everything is green, flowers are blooming.. It's awesome. I just wished I could of gone out today. But oh well. I think it would of been great to go horseback riding, but I can't since I don't have anymore horses. Plus the thing about being spring is that the semester is almost OVER! haha I hope you all are enjoying the weather. If it's not as perfect as you want it to be, I am so sorry. Hang in there it'll get better. I had my spring break last week, which was alright. Glad I got break, but this week most of the schools are on theirs. Including the dance studio I go to. So No Dancing this week.. bummer :/ I also really want to get out and hang with my friends it's been awhile since everyone is so busy. Anyways, I hope you all have a good day!

Final Survey

Hey Guys!
I know its been awhile!
I promise I will try to blog more often.
I do want to ask a favor though. I am doing a Business Report on Cliques and Association in the Workplace. Can you please take my survey, so I get as many opinion's as I can. I'd really appreciate it!
(click the link below!)

http://www.surveymonkey.com/s/J36M3H7

Thank you!

Strategy in getting the Dreamboat!

I know kinda silly title huh?? My mom said she'd use the term "Dreamboat" back in the day. What does that word mean? Basically your dream guy!
So here is my stategy~
In all hopes I really hope that my future husband has green eyes. I absolutly love them. I want kids with green eyes.. My grandmother had blue and my dad has hazel. My mom and I have brown. But anyways, so back to strategy..
PATIENCE!!! Yes it is hard to have this when you feel like no guy is ever gonna take a second look at you. Which I do feel most of the time. I think that if you aren't deperate to find somebody that it just will come along. I am still young, I still got other important things to do. There is this one guy that I feel could be the Dreamboat, I just don't know his feeling towards me. I'm sorry, but if you tell me that the best answer is go and tell him you like him. That is just WRONG! I can't do that again. He probably wouldn't even look at me.
I would however just casually talk to him and see if our friendship develops more. Then maybe I'll know..
~PEACE!

My Monday

My neice and I got to hang out with my best friend. We went to the Dollar Tree, Maurices, Kohls. I bought an anniversary card for older couple I know and a new black dress. I saw it last night on the website, so I went in to check to see if the dress was in my size and it was!! After we got back home I had to get ready for my first dance class in 6 months.. I was a little rusty but I think I'll get back into it agian. I hope that it will be a good year.. So Yay!!

Last Weekend

Hello Follwers,
   I am so sorry for not updating my blog in awhile. I guess with finals and everything I got preoccupied, but I am free now. So I've been hanging out with my friends and family since I've been off.. Last weekend I went with my friend and her family to the local skating rink. I didn't skate, but I got to hang out with my other friends who were there. I also played air hockey which has been forever since I played it. Its silly but the friend that I was playing with hurt their shoulder awhile ago and is still recovering, totally beat me! But in my defense, I accidently  got the puck in my side a couple of times.
     Oh well. Next Time I will not be defeated!! Monday I am starting dance again and I am so excited!!